Claudia Black, Janet Woititz, and other authors and practitioners made this concept popular back in
the 1980's. The Don't Rules are "don't feel, don't trust, and don't talk." In other words, do not feel your feelings, do not
trust yourself (or others), and do not talk about it-the problem-to others (especially to "them," the abusers). These rules
are familiar to those who have experienced childhood abuse and other micro traumas.
Many people who are recipients
of racism or sexism -- or any kind of "ism"-- develop this set of "rules" as well toward the perceived abusing group. In this
case, the perceived abuser may be the dominant group. The dominant group can be defined along racial or ethnic lines.
As a member of abused groups, the person learns that he or she cannot automatically trust a person of a
perceived abuser group. Instead, the members of the perceived abuser group will have to "earn and demonstrate trust" to the
abused group and its members. As part of the healing from societal trauma, the abused group and their members would eventually
need to experience (the perceived abuser) person as an individual and not a representative of a group that has harmed them.